Choose a positive path
Bonded, bound.
To those blue eyes
Secret soul I found
Ultimate loving prize
On a path to joy
But took a turn away
In one step hopes destroy
Lamentable sad day
Haunting azure glow
Echoes of intimate us
A love I will always know
Now reduced to dust
Mind ticking over
Without focused care
Thought jumps to thought
Frantic, erratic, nothing there
There’s a hole far inside
Your mental space vacancy
Thinking once used for you and I
Means heart and head lie empty
It seems even when apart
You resided deep within
A modelled version of you
Where I knew what was happening
A room where I always had a view
So when we said no more
You left me twice, once for real, then
You vacated my internal penthouse floor
I’ve mentally bounced around
As I care take your room
Lonely, with a constant sense
You’ll be back soon.
But you never will.
A pain at my centre
Tears in my eyes
An ache for emotion
All thoughts I despise
Stuck in the moment
When I’m sat with you
You broken in pain
Because, we are through.
The love in between us
Grown ever-so fast
Was real and gave hope
Of a bond, built to last
But the differences
Rose from within to without
Proving no future
Decided, no doubt.
Still emotional tethers
Connect you and I
Hence the pain I am feeling
And the tears in my eyes.
Silence in your absence
No messages to make the day seem sweet
No plans with friends, dates out together
No secret romantic late night meet.
Feelings still active, heart still engaged
Daydreaming about you, wondering how you are
Wanting to make sure you are happy, protected
But unable to contact you, distant, apart.
Can’t tell you about my day, how it went
Can’t share my successes, fears or how I feel
Can’t plan for our future, can’t see a way through
With no witness, no partner, life looses its appeal.
There is no one to protect, no goal for my love
You’re not at my side, my hand has no pair
Existence is loneliness, melancholy, solitude
You’re not here, worst of all I know you’re not there.
It’s not as it was
Stoic silent stance
I’m hurt and worried
Theres no second chance
To make good the bad
Words you said in rage
That hit at my heart
Can I turn the page?
Keep on writing
This tale of two in love
When one is so unkind
Sorry is not enough
The pattern revealed
Repeats for all time
A give and take divide
No one shines
You don’t love me
In a way that I’d like
I can’t make you happy
Try as I might
You go find yourself
I’ll my hope retrieve
I chose to love you
Now I choose to leave
Say it
Tell me you do
Don’t leave me like this
I’ve said it to you
Say you love me
This has all been a dream
And on waking
Stop the pain extreme
I cannot cope
There is no way
For me to repair
After this torrid day
You’ve rocked me
You’ve sprung a trap
Said you need an out
Because of the gap
Between you and I
How I am and what you need
You’ve made a choice
But it’s not agreed
Just say you do
Or even that you might
Don’t end all this
When happiness was in sight
I’m out of the rat race
Out of the fight
To get into work
Get home at night
The push on the platform
The squeeze, holding a rail
The heat in the summer
Groans when services fail
Seated, sleeping commuters
People, for others, making way
The books they are reading
New faces each day
I’m out of the rat race
Out of the fight
I’m already missing it
Escape as I might
She’s hating her work
Life’s not turned out to plan
While you’ve done alright
About the best that you can
She’s unhappy and nervous
You’re in love with her heart
She says she loves you
Which is soon from your start
But then the demons come out
The worries appear
How can she be happy
With you oh so near
She’ll never match up
Or catch on your lead
So she makes you feel sad
States you’re full of greed
When you’re not, you’re just you
And you’ve worked every day
To get better, more successful
Until you did find a way
Because she is lost
Your success can’t mean fun
Doesn’t mean praise
or any sense that you’ve won
It’s an unfairness
You’ve gained over her and the rest
An indication of bias
Not a sign you did best
She’s jealous of your “kingdom”
Your security
Displaying her envy
A lack of maturity
So it’s ending, you can’t
Not because your love’s not true
But by denying your life
She can’t be in love with you
Cornered, trapped
Black dog calls
Melancholy
Towering walls
Lift descends
Bottom of the well
Sinking stomach
Feeling unwell
Lack of grip
No steps to take
Fallen down
Laid low, a fake
The masquerade
Of muddling through
Slips and breaks
Exposing you
Not good enough
Not happy or glad
Loathing of self
Bereft and sad
An anxious mind
Crushes all hope
Poisoned heart
With no antidote
Numbed from joy
Immersed in pain
Doused in dark
In tears again
The black dog calls
I sit alone
Surviving hurt
All on my own
Wretched conflict
You should have
But you couldn’t
You were too swept up in being you to realise
That you shouldn’t
Have said what you said
Meant what you did
I’d have been better off running
I wish that I’d hid
This news that would hurt you
I tried to protect
Now it’s wretched conflict
Our relationship wrecked
Quest for Love 
Love Listens